#ThanksMichelleObama

As we approach the end of the year and the end of the Obama administration, I feel that it is important for me to take a moment and express gratitude to this exceptional First Lady. Personal opinion about her politics asides, Michelle Obama has conducted herself with grace and poise even in the face of ugliness on an unprecedented scale. I have seen five First Ladies in my lifetime. I can’t remember any of them facing the level of scrutiny of Michelle Obama. Sometimes the criticism took on a racial tone. 

With all of that, the admiration that I have for this strong, intelligent woman is difficult to express. It was clear looking at the Obamas that they had such a strong marriage. There was never a hint that there was anything other than devotion and respect between the two of them. In whatever picture you see of them together, you see a clear sense of respect and love between the two of them. You see it in President Obama’s eyes when he speaks about his wife. This is a man who clearly sees the beauty of his wife at a deeper level than the superficial trappings of beauty. He admires her intelligence, determination, grace, and patience. As he said in his speech at the DNC this summer, he felt that he married up. You see this reflected back at him whenever Michelle speaks about her husband. Theirs is a relationship built on mutual respect. 

As I watched the election cycle, I was struck by the tone in how now President-elect spoke about women. It was important for someone to express my own dismay at not just the language being used but the actions and sentiments being expressed. Michelle Obama did not disappoint. Her speech in New Hampshire while on the campaign trail for Hillary Clinton captured so perfectly so many of the emotions that I was feeling. This wasn’t a speech about politics but one about how words matter.

When I look back over these last eight years, I am struck by the genuine passion that First Lady Obama showed no matter what she was tackling. Whether it was her childhood obesity campaign or her work with military families or her work on educating girls, it never came across as something she was doing just for show. She truly seemed to care. There was something inside of her that spurred her on and gave her the energy to keep working when others criticized her work.

It is difficult to really put the impact that this wonderful woman has had on my life. As I move into more uncertain times with the rest of the nation, I can only hold on to the hope that Michelle Obama and President Barack Obama gave all of us. They weren’t perfect, but they unselfishly gave themselves to this country. So all I can really say is this, sincerely and from the bottom of my heart: Thanks Michelle Obama. Thanks Obama.

Don't Tell Me to Smile: Collective Grief and Why It's Important

2016 has been a shitty ass year. We lost Alan Rickman, David Bowie, Gene Wilder, Prince, Muhammad Ali, Leonard Cohen, John Glenn, George Michael, Carrie Fisher, and now Debbie Reynolds just to name a few. Add this to the lack of hope and fear many feel following the election of Donald Trump as the next President of the US and Brexit, and you can begin to understand why people are saying “Fuck you 2016!”

It’s been all over Facebook, a collective catharsis of the emotions that people are feeling. Yet, in the midst of the massive release of all the feels, there are those among us who are choosing to look on the bright side. They are trying to encourage friends and family to do the same. I get it. Honestly, I understand the impulse to try and look at all of the good things that have happened this year. And yes, there has been some. We finally got a good Spider-Man as part of Captain America: Civil War. We found out that yes, Jon Snow is alive. Well actually, he was brought back from the dead, but you get the point. Benedict Cumberbatch was Dr. Strange. There was a new Harry Potter play and film. I found out my Patronus is a Basset Hound. The Cubs finally won the World Series. Basically, there has been some joy in the midst of our collective suffering.

But here's the thing. Please, don’t tell me to look on the bright side and think of all of the positive things. That’s not what I want to do right now. I want to feel the darkness, and that’s ok. It’s ok to be sad and mourn. It’s fine to acknowledge that, in terms of years, this one has sucked donkey balls. 

Collective grief can be good. Feeling those "negative" emotions has its place. There is solidarity in our collective cries of suffering. Aristotle talked about the need for catharsis in his Poetics. It is one of the motivations behind tragic theater. The audience shares in an emotional release, usually of fear or anger, in order to move towards a better society. This is an important facet of community building, sharing grief and suffering.

But this is what I hear when you tell me that I should try to look for the light, “You know, honey, you should smile more.” It feels like those moments when I’m walking down the street, lost in thought, and some random dude yells at me to smile. I don’t feel like smiling right now, and I shouldn’t have to. There are many of us who don’t feel like smiling right now. It comes across as though we are being told that our feelings of anger, despair, and grief are not justified and valid. This couldn’t be further from the truth. In order to truly appreciate those feelings of joy, we must be able to counterbalance it with grief and pain. 

Just let us have this moment. How does it harm you? If you want to reflect about the blessings in your life, more power to you. All I ask is that you don’t do so without commenting about how everyone else is so negative and we need to stop being so. I just don’t feel like doing the same right now, and that’s ok.

Seriously, 2016, go fuck yourself!

Below is a clip from John Oliver’s Last Week Tonight. Who knew when this aired a few weeks back that we were only beginning the downward spiral into 2017. 

Yes, I'm a Ravenclaw, But It Might Not Mean What You Think

To anyone who knows me at even the cursory level, this would come as no surprise: I am a Ravenclaw. This revelation is usually met with responses like “Of course you are,” sarcastic “Shocker”, and knowing nods of affirmation. Facts just seem to stick in my head for no particular reason and remain easy to recall years later when they should be past their usefulness. Some see it as a blessing. Sometimes, it seems a curse.

This is perhaps why I found myself identifying most with Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter books. She was probably the character most like me growing up. When I was sorted on Pottermore, I thought for sure that I would likely end up in Gryffindor the way that Hermione had. Yet, I found myself in Ravenclaw. Not entirely unexpected because other characters in the book often wondered why Hermione had not been sorted into that house.

This got me thinking about what lies beneath the Sorting Hat’s placement of students. We tend to think about the Sorting Hat distributing students according to their strengths, but what if it’s really according to their weaknesses? I know on the surface this seems a silly proposition. But what if the Sorting Hat is categorizing students according to the defense mechanisms they use to hide their true selves.

When I look at myself over the years, it is my intellect that I use to keep others from seeing the insecurities I have about myself. If I am able to have some abstract conversation about an obscure film, no one can see that I feel uncomfortable around people and am just trying to hide my fear that those who get to know me won’t really like me. My identity becomes my intellect rather than the whole person with all of my flaws. This is perhaps why I find comfort in research. When I am most stressed, I will dive into tinkering on my undergraduate thesis or do more reading and research for the novel I am working on. It calms my mind by giving me something simple and true to focus my energy on. As a Ravenclaw, I hide behind my knowledge to try and keep people from discovering that I don’t really belong.

How might this theory work with the other houses?

Let’s begin with the much maligned house, Slytherin. The main traits of this house are pride, ambition, and cunning. These are traits that certainly have both a dark and light side to them. In order to explore this, let’s look at Draco Malfoy. Sure, in the beginning of the books, he is a jerk. He takes such pride in being a Pure Blood and a Slytherin that he looks down on all of those who aren’t. Yet, inherent in this bravado is a need to prove himself. His father had been involved in Voldemort’s rise, and although Lucius Malfoy escaped imprisonment in Azkaban, there is still mistrust of Draco’s family. This is perhaps while he constantly finds himself in competition with Harry. He uses his ambition as a means to hide his own insecurities about where he belongs. This is why in the end we can see Draco as a tragic figure who is being used in Voldemort’s plot to kill Dumbledore.

Moving on to Gryffindor. This house values courage, bravery, and determination. On the surface all of these seem like virtuous traits. How might these manifest in being used as a defense mechanism? Ron Weasley seems to exemplify how this might occur. From the moment we meet Ron in the books, he is scared that he will end up in a house other than Gryffindor and that he isn’t quite Gryffindor material. This causes him to exaggerate the traits of Gryffindor in certain circumstances. Ron chooses to sacrifice himself in the game of wizard’s chess to allow Harry to go on to find the Sorcerer’s Stone. It’s why in the Mirror of Erised Ron sees himself as Head Boy and winning the House Cup. This desire to be seen as being worthy of Gryffindor also enflames his desire to compete in the Triwizard Tournament and his subsequent jealousy when Harry ends up in the tournament. Through his acts of bravery, he tries to hide his insecurities about not belonging.

Now we finally turn to the house that many joke about: Hufflepuff. Hufflepuffs value hard work, patience, loyalty, and fair play. Members of this house are perhaps most themselves. They are known to be good friends to all. Yet, even this can be a way of masking insecurities. Now, this may come across as more cynical than it is intended. It is through their unsurpassed loyalty that Hufflepuffs hide the feeling that they don’t belong. We’ve all come across that person who seems to try too hard to be everyone’s friend, so much so that we may begin to doubt their sincerity. This can be the problem with Hufflepuffs. Everyone wants to be liked. There’s nothing wrong with that, but sometimes in the pursuit of that, we can lose ourselves. This is the danger that someone in Hufflepuff might face. It’s why when in the maze at the end of the Triwizard tournament, Cedric Diggory acted in ways that were not always in the interest of fair play until just before grabbing the cup with Harry so that they both might win.

MCU v DCEU - Treatment of Women

Spoiler Warning: I’m going to be discussing some of the films and TV shows in the MCU and DCEU. If you haven’t seen everything to date, you might want to proceed with caution.

The Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) is more progressive in its depiction of women than the DC Extended Universe (DCEU). Now, I know that the DCEU will have a female-led superhero film before the MCU. Wonder Woman is slated for release in 2017 whereas Captain Marvel will not be released until 2019. Fans of the MCU have been clamoring for a Black Widow film almost from the moment she was introduced. This is not what I am going to argue. But rather, I am going to look at how each female hero is depicted in the universes. I am also aware that there is far less to look at in terms of the DCEU than the MCU.

I watched Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice a few weeks back and was struck by something that I didn’t really notice previously. Aside from the convoluted plot from trying to combine the events of The Dark Knight Returns with The Death of Superman, the ending did not have to play out the way that it did. Wonder Woman was completely capable of killing Doomsday with the Kryptonite spear. Superman did not have to assume the role of the Christ figure and sacrifice himself for the good of humanity. Wonder Woman is completely capable of wielding that spear without any of the effects Kryptonite. She is a goddess, an Amazon warrior. Yet, she was disregarded in favor of the male protagonist in an act of self-sacrifice. There seems to be a general lack of confidence in the female heroes.

In addition to the lack of confidence in Wonder Woman in that final battle, there is also the femme fatale introduction that we have to the character of Diana Prince in the film. We first see her alter ego at a party where she is portrayed as a mystery seductress. She uses her looks to throw Bruce Wayne off his game. It’s not the heroic Wonder Woman that we are introduced to but a sexy version that uses her wiles to get what she wants.

Now, the MCU is not entirely innocent in the sexualization of its female characters. Black Widow is definitely a character that uses her sexually to get information. Whereas Diana Prince is a goddess, Natasha Romanoff is a trained spy. In other words, Diana does not need to be sexualized in order to be successful. While women should be more than their physical forms, as someone without divine powers, Natasha using her sexuality in this manner is more forgivable.

The problematic sexualization of Black Widow aside, she isn’t treated as though she is any less in the eyes of the other Avengers. She is a fully capable member of the team and treated as such. During the Battle of New York in The Avengers and the Battle of Sokovia in The Avengers: Age of Ultron, Romanoff fights side by side with her Avenger compatriots. She isn’t brushed aside in favor of the male heroes.

There is also the problem of the love interests in the DCEU versus those in the MCU. Now with Man of Steel and Batman v Superman, we have the issue of Lois Lane. While Lois is a smart and capable journalist, she always finds herself in need of being rescued by Superman. It’s as though her only reason to exist within the plot is to put Superman into situations where he must rescue her sometimes risking the well-being of others. There is little that we know about Lois Lane beyond her interaction with Superman and Clark Kent as his love interest.

A direct contrast to the Lois Lane-Superman dynamic is the relationship between Captain America and Peggy Carter. Like Lois, Peggy is smart and capable. However, unlike Lois, she doesn’t ever need Cap to rescue her or any man for that matter. Over the two seasons of Agent Carter, we saw her take control of situations in ways that the men around her were incapable of doing. She was consistently underestimated by the men in power around her. Every time she rose to the occasion. While it bothered me at first when the tree speech was attributed to Peggy Carter at her funeral during the eulogy given by her niece, Sharon, in Captain America: Civil War, it does ultimately seem fitting for her to have said these powerful words. It’s probably one of my favorite moments in Captain America comics. For a woman to show such strength is important.
 

I must admit that I am less familiar with the DC television shows, but as they do not seem to be connected to the films, it seems ok not to bring those into the conversation. This is different from the way Marvel integrates film and television. Because of this, there are certainly more opportunities to develop strong female characters and women-driven storylines. It is telling that the second season of Jessica Jones will be directed by all women. It is also telling that the Wonder Woman film will be helmed by a man rather than a female director. There seems to be something empowering happening at Marvel Studios, and honestly, I can’t wait to see where it goes.

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A Face that Launched a Thousand "Ships"

The tradition of an audience shipping characters goes back a long way. We can see it in the saga of Sam and Diane on Cheers. The back and forth of “will they, won’t they” has been a fundamental dynamic of male and female relationships on television. We saw it in the relationship between Mulder and Scully on The X-Files. Sometimes this dynamic expands into a triangle where one party must make a choice with two or more other individuals involved. This is when ‘shipping becomes particularly interesting as it segments the audience into different camps. I’ve always heard the Betty or Veronica argument from the Archie comics. In my youth, it was the drama of whether Kelly Kapowski should be with Zack Morris or A.C. Slater on Saved by the Bell. As I grew up, it was first the Brenda, Dylan, Kelly triangle followed by the Dylan, Kelly, Brandon triangle of Beverly Hills 90210. Viewers were clear about which team they resided on. We’ve seen it time and time again: Team Edward v. Team Jacob (Twilight), Team Bill v. Team Eric v. Team Alcide (True Blood), Team Dean v. Team Jess v. Team Logan (Gilmore Girls), etc. Over the years, we’ve moved on from teams to cute couple names such as Richonne (Walking Dead) even when there is not the conflict for the audience of who the character should be with. Honestly, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. There is also the world of slash ‘ships i.e. Rick and Daryl from The Walking Dead, Sherlock and Watson (both Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman and RDJ and Jude Law), Sansa Stark and Margaery Tyrell from Game of Thrones, etc.

Sometimes these ships are plot-driven; sometimes they are fan wishes. These fan wishes are on occasion fulfilled by a show’s creator for a variety of reasons. For example, we now have a romance on Walking Dead between Rick and Michonne. Much of the choice to put those characters together stems from Michonne taking pieces of the story arc of a character still alive in the comics but dead in the world of the show. This has led to a character that is dead in the comics being poised to take on a relationship storyline on the show that once belonged to Michonne because she is still alive in the show. While it was wish fulfillment for fans of the show, it is ultimately something that has been driven by plot and the choices that the producers and writers made in telling their story. It all makes sense in the structure of the world.

The thing that always makes me curious about the concept of shipping characters is the level of passion that some fans exhibit. I don’t condemn their enthusiasm for character relationships. I don’t think I could call myself a proper nerd if I did. I do, however, wonder at the animosity between the different camps on occasion. Looking back at the height of the Twilight phenomenon, the level of ferocity of those on Team Edward and those on Team Jacob could rival the Yankees/Red Sox rivalry. These girls, and some guys, were so convinced about who Bella should end up with that some readers were ultimately disappointed with the way Meyers’ resolved this love triangle. There was similar disappointment with fans of the Sookie Stackhouse novels which would become the HBO show, True Blood. Although, I agree with the disappointment in how the romantic relationships ended up for Sookie because it made all of the previous romantic entanglements of the series essentially unimportant.

Some of the appeal of shipping characters for the audience is that it allows the reader or viewer to try and figure out where the story is going to go. For example, those people who ‘ship Jon Snow and Daenerys (Dany) Targaryen are trying to figure out how George R.R. Martin might resolve some questions about who will assume the Iron Throne and reign over Westeros. This ship involves looking at clues in the text as well as the history of the world to figure out where the author is going. Even though Jon and Dany may be related, it would not be out of the realm of possibility for them to end up together given the history of the Targaryens marrying within their family.

Shipping characters, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. It demonstrates the audience’s passion for the characters and world created. However, when it begins to create animosity and petty arguments within a fandom, it can become more problematic.