2016 has been a shitty ass year. We lost Alan Rickman, David Bowie, Gene Wilder, Prince, Muhammad Ali, Leonard Cohen, John Glenn, George Michael, Carrie Fisher, and now Debbie Reynolds just to name a few. Add this to the lack of hope and fear many feel following the election of Donald Trump as the next President of the US and Brexit, and you can begin to understand why people are saying “Fuck you 2016!”
It’s been all over Facebook, a collective catharsis of the emotions that people are feeling. Yet, in the midst of the massive release of all the feels, there are those among us who are choosing to look on the bright side. They are trying to encourage friends and family to do the same. I get it. Honestly, I understand the impulse to try and look at all of the good things that have happened this year. And yes, there has been some. We finally got a good Spider-Man as part of Captain America: Civil War. We found out that yes, Jon Snow is alive. Well actually, he was brought back from the dead, but you get the point. Benedict Cumberbatch was Dr. Strange. There was a new Harry Potter play and film. I found out my Patronus is a Basset Hound. The Cubs finally won the World Series. Basically, there has been some joy in the midst of our collective suffering.
But here's the thing. Please, don’t tell me to look on the bright side and think of all of the positive things. That’s not what I want to do right now. I want to feel the darkness, and that’s ok. It’s ok to be sad and mourn. It’s fine to acknowledge that, in terms of years, this one has sucked donkey balls.
Collective grief can be good. Feeling those "negative" emotions has its place. There is solidarity in our collective cries of suffering. Aristotle talked about the need for catharsis in his Poetics. It is one of the motivations behind tragic theater. The audience shares in an emotional release, usually of fear or anger, in order to move towards a better society. This is an important facet of community building, sharing grief and suffering.
But this is what I hear when you tell me that I should try to look for the light, “You know, honey, you should smile more.” It feels like those moments when I’m walking down the street, lost in thought, and some random dude yells at me to smile. I don’t feel like smiling right now, and I shouldn’t have to. There are many of us who don’t feel like smiling right now. It comes across as though we are being told that our feelings of anger, despair, and grief are not justified and valid. This couldn’t be further from the truth. In order to truly appreciate those feelings of joy, we must be able to counterbalance it with grief and pain.
Just let us have this moment. How does it harm you? If you want to reflect about the blessings in your life, more power to you. All I ask is that you don’t do so without commenting about how everyone else is so negative and we need to stop being so. I just don’t feel like doing the same right now, and that’s ok.
Seriously, 2016, go fuck yourself!
Below is a clip from John Oliver’s Last Week Tonight. Who knew when this aired a few weeks back that we were only beginning the downward spiral into 2017.
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